“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”- Lewis B. Smedes
Forgiveness means freedom. When you forgive those who have hurt you, you are not letting them off the hook of pain, you are letting yourself off the hook of pain and resentment. When you forgive people, you are letting go of the past. You are now ready to move forward. It does not mean you are letting the other person go unpunished. It means that you are letting go of the pain inflicted upon you by that person.
So, why do we forgive?
In her book The How of Happiness: A New Approach To Getting The Life You Want, Sonja Lyubomirsky writes: “In the long run, the preoccupation, hostility, and resentment that we harbor serve only to hurt us, both emotionally and physically.” She adds: “Forgiveness can be regarded in the larger context of community and society; it can deepen our sense of shared humanity (that we are not alone in experiencing hurts) and strengthens our personal relationships and our wider connections with others.”
You forgive people to let yourself off the hook of pain and resentment, to let go of the past, to be yourself again, to enjoy your life, to live in the moment, to focus on what is relevant to you and others, to be happy, to improve your health and well-being, to let the other person go, to free yourself from prisoner, to connect with loving people, to build your character, and to love and be loved again.
Don’t allow resentment to poison your life. Choose happiness, love, humility, courage, gratitude, and forgiveness, and move on. Enjoy your life!
“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.”– George Bernard Shaw
Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating your real self. You should spend your time developing yourself, not trying to find who you are. We are not perfect. And we will never be perfect. If you are looking for perfection, you still have a long way to go.
Life is about doing better every day. Life is not about living other people’s dreams. It is about growing yourself, moving yourself forward.
You create yourself by living for yourself, by thinking for yourself, by loving yourself, by asking the right questions, by challenging yourself, by believing in yourself, by being honest with yourself and others.
When you engage in the game of finding yourself, you will miss your real self. You create yourself by embracing who you are, not who you are trying to be. Be happy with who you are, and you will enjoy your life.
Success is a process. It is not a final stop. If you want to really be successful, you must do the right things. Successful people are successful because they do what others are not willing to do, and they don’t do what others do.
“You can do anything if you believe you can do it. You can’t do anything if you believe you can’t do anything.”
If you want more beautiful things in life, do
things in beautiful ways. You must give beautiful things to people, and people
will give beautiful things back to you.
Here are six things that successful people DON’T do:
don’t waste time.
Successful people don’t waste their time. They value their time. They do the right and the most important things first. They don’t waste their time living in the past. They don’t waste their time living in the future. They waste their time living in the moment.
“All that really belongs to us is time; even he who has nothing else has that.”– Baltasar Gracian
don’t try to change what they cannot change.
Successful people know what they can change, and
they change it. Successful people know what they cannot change, and they don’t
even try to change it. If you try to change what you cannot change, you are
just wasting your time.
“Life is not orderly. No matter how we try to make it so, right in the middle of it we die, lose a leg, fall in love, drop a jar of applesauce.”-Natalie Goldberg, zen practitioner
don’t fear success.
Successful people don’t fear success. They embrace
it. They welcome it. They prepare for it. They are successful in their minds
before they meet success. They know that success comes with discipline, with
responsibility, with focus, and with integrity. They believe in themselves that
they can succeed.
“Your chances of success in any undertaking can always be measured by your belief in yourself.”– Robert Collier
don’t fear failure.
Successful people don’t fear failure. They embrace
failure. They know that failure is part of the game of life. When they fail at
something, they just keep moving. They don’t blame anyone for their mistakes.
They take responsibility for what happened to them.
“I have not failed I have just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”– Thomas Edison
don’t doubt themselves.
Successful people don’t doubt themselves. They
believe they can do anything. They believe that nothing is impossible in life.
They don’t doubt themselves. Successful people are scared, but they don’t allow
fear to stop them from achieving their dreams.
“Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities. Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own power you cannot be successful or happy.”- Norman Vincent Pearle
don’t search for happiness.
Successful people don’t search for happiness. They give happiness. They know that when you give happiness to people, you will be happy. For that reason, they always try to make people happy. If you want to be happy, make people happy. Add happiness to people’s lives, and they will add happiness to your life.
“You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.”- Albert Camus
One of the reasons we live is to be our own master, is to control our lives, is to take charge of our lives. Taking control of our lives does not come easy in a society where everybody wants a piece of you. Everyone wants something from you. The question is: “Can you please everyone?”
“If you want to imitate anyone, imitate yourself.”
No, you can’t. That is if you are really honest with yourself. You cannot please everyone. If you try to do it, you will never have time for yourself. It is okay to listen to people, but don’t try to please everyone. If you do, you will fail.
“You deserve a better life. You deserve to live your life in your own way. You deserve to have a healthy life. But if you put everyone’s interests before yours, you will find it difficult to live a good life.”
In the words of Marva Collins, “Trust yourself, think for yourself, act for yourself, speak for yourself, be yourself, imitation is suicide.” He is absolutely right. If you want to live your life in your own way, you MUST trust yourself. You must think for yourself. You must act for yourself. You must speak for yourself. You must be yourself. You MUST NEVER IMITATE ANYONE. If you want to imitate anyone, imitate yourself.