7 Ways To Protect Yourself From Toxic People

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Why are people toxic? Are they really toxic? What can we do about it?

A toxic person is someone with poisonous behavior. The way a toxic person behaves is not compatible with others. Dr. Travis Bradberry and other experts provided comprehensive definitions of toxic people, and what they do to relationships and their organizations. According to Dr Travis, “Toxic people defy logic. Some are blissfully unaware of the negative impact that they have on those around them and others seem to derive satisfaction from creating chaos and pushing other people’s buttons.”

In addition to Dr Travis’s definition of toxic people, Mark Twain said, “Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you too, can become great.” Hans F. Hansan adds: “People inspire or they drain you – pick them wisely.”

When you find out that your friend is acting out, don’t jump to conclusions. Why? Because they are human beings with feelings. They may be going through something personal and they don’t want to tell anyone. As a result, they will always be aggressive. I am not defending their terrible behavior. I am just saying that it is important to understand the reason behind something before we become the judge. We are good at judging others, because we are so perfect. No, you are not! Your behavior sucks, too!

If you work or you are the toxic one that everyone has to run away from, here are some strategies to cope:

Control your mind. When you work or live with a toxic person (a person with a terrible behavior), protect your mind from negative emotions. This is important because a negative person does not spread positive news, they spread only negative news.

Connect with people who encourage you to be yourself. We all need good people in our lives. The people that accept us for who we are, not who we pretend to be. People that will encourage us to do our best, to be our best.

Connect with people who spread positive news. The food for your soul is positive thoughts, not negative thoughts. You need positive thoughts to help you go through challenging times. No matter what, no matter where you are, no matter what you are doing, always try to be a positive person. I know it is hard to do, but it is doable.

Understand their reasons. This is important because if you know what is happening to your coworker, you won’t take anything personal. It is sometimes not about you, but about them. Learn to understand the “why” before you take them to court.

Know yourself. If you know yourself, if you know your values, you will know how to respond. Lao Tzu said, “Respond intelligently even to unintelligent treatment.”

Stay on your purpose. If you are busy doing or pursuing your purpose in life, you have no time to engage yourself with small-minded people. According to the author of this quote, “It’s so nice when toxic people stop talking to you. It’s like the trash took itself out.”

Maintain a positive mindset. We can’t avoid working with negative people. If you do work with one or two, always be positive. Don’t play their games. Don’t reduce yourself to their level. That is what they want you to do. Don’t do it!

Putting it Together:

People with negative attitudes are everywhere. How you deal with them will make the difference. Be positive.


The Gift of Attitude

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When we think positively about something or a person, we are showing a positive attitude toward that thing. On the contrary, when we think and behave in a negative way toward something or a person, we are showing a negative attitude toward that thing.

Our attitudes are our negative or positive opinions towards situations, people, or things.

Winston Churchill said,

“Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.”

Why do we do that? Because we are human beings with feelings, interests, beliefs, and values. When we meet or find ourselves in situations that we are not comfortable with, without any further confrontation, our attitudes change. We feel threatened. We feel we are under attack. Some people will even go into a panic attack, just because they saw something they are not comfortable with. When you find yourself in that type of horrible situation, relax and calm yourself. Do a brief self-talk. Take a solid deep breath. After a while, you will be fine.

Our attitudes are not stable, they change. Thank God!

If you want to go far in life, if you want to succeed, if you want to build positive relationships with people, if you want to enjoy your children, if you want to enjoy your life, it is very important to try to develop a positive attitude. For example, if you are interviewing for a job, your potential employer is going to lean towards the candidate who have demonstrated or showed great signs of a positive attitude over you. People want to be around someone that can make them laugh. Be the one to do so.

According to Earl Nightingale, “Our attitudes towards others determines their attitudes towards us.”

It sounds basic, but lots of people find it difficult to do. If you want people to treat you with respect, you need to treat them with respect. It is a two-way street. You get what you give out.

No matter how terrible our attitudes are, they are changeable. We can change them. We can change our negative attitudes to positive attitudes by thinking positively, by making the decision to be a happy person, by monitoring our negative thoughts, by talking to your positive friends, and by enjoying the beauty of nature.

William James once said, “The greatest discovery of my generation is that a man can alter his life by altering his attitudes.”

Putting it together:

A positive attitude is better than a negative attitude. One will lead you to success; the other one will lead you to failure. Choose wisely.