If You Want People To Trust And To Work With You, Trust Them First
By E. Bright
“He, who does not trust enough, will not be trusted.”- Lao Tzu
Trust is the most important asset we have to live our lives, and to work with people. Without trust we are nothing. Trust is the bond between people. Trust is responsible for great relationships. Trust is one of the qualities we need to make it in life. You work well with people when they trust you. They believe that you are the type of a person they can work with. Who are you when nobody is willing to work with you?
Trust to be trusted. Once people trust you, they have concluded that you are a reliable person, a credible person, a truthful person, and that you are an ethical person. They believe in you. They believe that you understand them. They believe that your interest in them is real, not fake.
Since trust is the “glue” of life, according to Stephen Covey, then it is important to maintain it. If people don’t trust you, there is not much you can achieve on your own. You need people to be successful.
Why is it so difficult for people to trust us?
Let look at some of the reasons why people don’t trust us:
You don’t trust people.
If you want people to trust you, you must trust them first.
You don’t keep your promise.
People will find it difficult to trust you when you say one thing today and do another thing tomorrow. When you promise people something, whether it’s a small or big thing, make sure you keep your promise. In other words, always “walk your talk.”
People don’t trust you because of their past experiences they have had with people.
A lot of people have been hurt in the past. As a result, they find it difficult to trust anyone. In order to win these people over to your camp, you must prove to them that you deserve to be trusted. If not, you are wasting your time.
People will not trust you when you hide valuable resources.
This is common in our organizations today. Sometimes senior managers hide valuable information from their subordinates. It is common in an organization where people don’t work together. They compete against each other, instead of working together. In such an organization, there always will be shortage of important information needed by the organization to execute their main purpose, which is to be profitable. As a result, employees will not trust their bosses.
The question is,
“What can we do to build trust?”
Let’s explore some strategies:
You must step out of your comfort zone to know people.
You cannot meet and know people if you are stuck in your comfort zone, where everything looks the same. If you don’t show people that you love and care about them, they will not know how to reciprocate it.
Be an open-minded person.
Where there is no honesty, there is no trust. Open your world to let good and loving people in. They are looking for a person like you. If you don’t open your mind, trust cannot happen. Trust starts with an open mind.
Listen to people.
An honest communication is crucial if we are to create room for trust to grow. Show people you are interested in them. Show people that they are important. The reason we don’t care to listen to people is that we are so occupied with our own things. If we create the time to meet and know people, they will create the time to know us, too. As a result, the gap between us will be shrinking, instead of widening.
Be a responsible person.
People will trust you when you behave in an acceptable way. They will trust you when you hold yourself accountable for your mess. People will trust you when you do what you say you will do. If not, you have no chance to win anyone over to your camp. When you are responsible, people will believe in you, and you will believe in yourself. It gives them confidence; and it gives you confidence, too.
Finally, Mahatma Gandhi once said, “The moment there is suspicion about a person’s motives, everything he does becomes tainted.”