The Three “MUSTS” That Hold Us Back

Grayscale Photo of Person Pulling Up Woman Using Rope

The three MUSTS that hold people back in life, according to Dr. Albert Ellis, psychologist, are:


I MUST do well prevents people from greatness because it puts FEAR in our minds before we even start anything. We are concerned with what people will say, instead of focusing on achieving greatness in life and in our careers.

What Should I Do?

  • Focus on starting something. NOW!
  • Accept the simple fact that nothing is perfect in the beginning. When you start something new, you are going to be terrible at it. Nobody starts something as an expert. We all start as a baby. So start as a baby. 
  • You have to start something before thinking of doing well at it. Start something!
  • Whatever it is that you want to do, go for it, not just wishing for it to happen.
  • Remember, the only person you are competing against is yourself. Don’t let anything hold you back- not even FEAR.
  • Go now!


Yes, they will treat you well. But remember, you have to treat yourself well, respect yourself, celebrate yourself, take good care of yourself before others will start from where you stop. Yourself first! People will join in, in celebrating you.

The real question is: How are you treating others?

  • Your wife/husband
  • Your siblings
  • Your child/children
  • Your teachers
  • Your doctors
  • Your pets
  • Your father/mother
  • Your friends (good and bad)
  • The vulnerable people
  • Your boss/manager
  • Your co-worker (friendly and unfriendly)
  • Your neighbors

You are connected to these people for a reason. So treat them with respect and dignity. When you treat people with respect and dignity, regardless of who they are, where they live, where they work, how they look, with whom they associate, they will treat you back with respect and dignity.

You get back what you give out.”

What Should I Do?

  1. Treat people with respect.
  2. Don’t judge anyone. If you do, you are judging yourself.
  3. Reach out to people you don’t even know. Reach out to old friends, reach out to your neighbors, ask them if they need any help.
  4. Help people who are CRITICALLY in need.
  5. Help people who are MODERATELY in need.
  6. Help people who are in need. Help people, don’t hurt people.


Sorry, the world MUST NOT be easy. Why MUST the world be easy? Ask yourself this question: “Am I easy to deal with?” The reason the world is not easy is because, we are the world (this sounds like the late Michael Jackson’s song). We have our conflicting ideas, values, and purposes in life. As a result, the world shouldn’t be easy. You should embrace it. The world is beautiful! Take the difficulties in the world as learning opportunities. Take it as an opportunity to know new places, to meet new people, to solve new problems, to correct your personal past mistakes. It is a learning opportunity, take it.

What Should I Do?

  • Embrace Challenges. Big or small, it is a learning opportunity for you. Never look at problems as problems, look at them as the FINEST opportunity to learn. Take it as a way to move forward. If you are not growing, you are dying.

    It is better to grow than to die. If you don’t do new things, you cannot grow. If you don’t do new things, you can’t learn how to think differently. Always search for new opportunities to learn new things.

  • Embrace challenges. Look for challenges. Hunt for challenges. If you do, you will continue to grow.